I am so average. If you were to ask me to list my top 3 skills I could have to say 1) My footballing ability. I mean I’m ok – I think I’ve got pretty good vision on the pitch but given the fact I’ve never played to a higher standard than Powerleague on a monday night with some mates AND i’m closer to 40 than 30 it’s unlikely I’ll be turning out for my beloved Norwich City and time soon. 2) My sense of humour. I think I’m a pretty funny guy… but then ask literally any guy if they think they’re funny and… well.. you know we’re a vain bunch. 3) My Kindness. Yep having scrabbled around to find a third I’m sticking in a value which is totally unquantifiable and isn’t really a skill at all. But I think kindness is important – so in it goes. Rest assured then I am a middle of the pack, jack of all trades, wouldn’t stand out in a crowd, average bloke. 

I was born in Stowmarket in Suffolk, with an older sister and a pet rabbit called Waffles that my mum accidently killed (Tip: Rabbits do not need baths nor to be dried with a hairdryer – they aren’t big fans).

I had a great childhood though and moved to the small Fenland town where I now live when I was 3 whereupon I did many very unremarkable things such as go to school and go on family holidays (with my family).

But the thing that would make the biggest difference in my life was my parents taking my sister and I to church each Sunday. As a result I began to hear about a God who not only loved me, but showed this by coming down to earth to die on a cross to take the punishment for the wrong I had done. 

Admittedly most of the time I was playing with my cars, or trying to sneakily steal one of my sisters sweets she was rationing during the service (I of course had eaten mine in a one-er at the start). But every now and again I would stop and listen and hear about my need to come to God and give my life to him, until on a camp with other young people in my early teens I finally did just that. It changed the rest of my life. 

Finishing school and going to Uni in Sheffield where I studied History, clearly the best subject ever but only really leads to one of two careers, teaching or being Indiana Jones (alas I failed the fitness test for the latter). There I also met a girl. 

Now hands up, whilst I’m sure I give off the veneer of a suave, sophisticated player *cough* I was (/am) not the smoothest when it comes to members of the opposite sex and therefore was delighted to find a woman whom I liked who actually liked me back! Incredible. 

Needless to say I married Rachel as swiftly as possible and 3 lovely boys followed in the years afterwards. 

And how I loved my little family. My favourite days would be family trips out, to local National Trust places, or to the seaside, proper middle aged stuff. But they were wonderful days, ones I shall treasure for the rest of my life.

Then one July evening in 2019, Rach started complaining of a terrible headache. Calling for an ambulance she was taken to hospital where I was told she had suffered a serious bleed on the brain. Even then staff were optimistic that given time Rach would recover, but it was not to be. She passed away just a few days later. 

Faced with the loss of my beloved wife, contemplating how on earth I would tell the boys and wondering just how I could go on, I saw a bible on the shelf in that little hospital room.

I asked the nurse who had kindly agreed to stay with me until a friend arrived, to read me a section from Romans 8. It reads: 

“Who shall separate us from the love of God? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?… No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

And in those few words God showed that when Rachel closed her eyes for the final time in this life, Jesus wasn’t just waiting for her on the other side. He was right there with her, holding her hand. Comforting her, filling her with such joy and contentment that she would have known no fear as he whispered in her ear “Well done my good and faithful servant, welcome home”.

And as I sat in that room, tears streaming down my face, I called out to God with more joy and peace in my heart than I had ever known before, because Rach was truly home – she’d just got there a little ahead of me.

Parenting 3 boys under 6 would turn out to be challenging (who knew!?), though to be honest it’s given me a world of material for this blog so I suppose I should be grateful! 

Several years on, I’m so blessed to have met someone else very special, Gemma. We became engaged in October 2021 and got married in May 2022. I can’t begin to tell you how much of a blessing she has been to me, understanding the journey I’ve been through and prayerfully supporting me through it, but also for the 3 boys who adore her. 

I can’t wait to see what God has instore for this next chapter, although what I do know is it will always be shaped by the wonderful influence of Rachel on our lives. 

To find out more about why I started this blog click here.